Weather or Not

First and foremost, it was not Mark Twain who famously said, “Everyone complains about the weather, but nobody does anything about it.” Those were, in fact, the words of Charles Dudley Warner, a contemporary of Twain and co-author, with Twain, of The Gilded Age: A Tale of Today.

 

But it was Lewis Black who said, "What does the word 'meteorologist' mean
in English? It means 'liar.'"

That being said, the public’s fascination and frustration with predicting weather is probably as old as humankind itself. Circa 650 BC, Babylonians attempted to forecast the weather based on cloud patterns and astrology. Three hundred years later, Aristotle described weather patterns in his scholastic work Meteorology. Theophastrus, a successor to Aristotle, compiled a book on weather and forecasting titled Book of Signs. Chinese weather observations extend back to 300 BC.

Flashing forward over the centuries, our obsession with the weather has created a cult of personality surrounding meteorologists. Following in the footsteps of pioneer “Today Show” broadcast journalist Frank Blair, Willard Scott and Al Roker (pictured above) became celebrities in their own right.

Based on the state’s seasonal extremes, two meteorologists from Minnesota merited mention in Wikipedia: Bud Kraehling (pictured above), the venerable statesman of weather maps who held court at WCCO-TV for almost 50 years, and Paul Douglas (pictured below), author of Prairie Skies and Restless Skies.

Barry ZeVan (“Barry ZeVan the Weatherman”) created a zany presence that lingered in the memory long after his departure from the Twin Cities for Las Vegas (pictured below) . Who knew that a TV weather forecaster could be treated like a rock star?

As a weatherman in Indianapolis, a young David Letterman (pictured below) congratulated a tropical storm for being upgraded to a hurricane. He also predicted hail the size of “canned hams.”

Early in his storied career, George Carlin trotted out a character called Al Sleet (pictured below), the perpetually stoned Hippy Dippy Weatherman whose typical telecast would run something like, “Tonight’s forecast: Dark. Continued mostly dark tonight, changing to wide scattered light towards morning.”

On a more serious note (but perhaps not all that more serious), portrayals of weather forecasters in television and on the screen have been diverse and entertaining, if not outright eclectic.

In an episode of “The Mary Tyler Moore Show,” Mary’s neighbor, Phyllis Lindstrom (Cloris Leachman), meets the TV station’s weatherman, Gordy Howard (John Amos), only to assume he’s a sportscaster because of his imposing physique and the fact that he’s African-American.  According to Amos, “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” creators James L. Brooks and Alan Burns’ sensitivity “did not pander to the lowest common denominator in terms of stereotypes or cheap humor…It was going against the grain.”

Amos played Gordy in a dozen episodes during the first three seasons of “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” before leaving in 1974 to portray James Evans Sr. on “Good Times.” He returned for an appearance on the seventh and final season of “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” in an episode especially tailored for him titled “Hail the Conquering Gordy.” Now a highly salaried national network morning show host on the East Coast, “Gordo” humiliates the tirelessly fawning Ted Baxter (Ted Knight) by gleefully telling him, “My picture hangs right next to Walter Cronkite.”

Famous last words from weatherman Dan O'Bannon (Charles Cyphers) in
"The Fog" -"Someone's at the front door, playing a stupid joke. And whoever it is,
they ain't gonna like finding me home."

Our favorite weatherman in a horror movie (not exactly an all-encompassing subgenre) has to be meteorologist Dan O'Bannon in director John Carpenter's 1980 ghost story "The Fog." Many characters in the film were named after well-known writers and directors in the horror and sci-fi genres; Dan O'Bannon wrote the screenplay for 1979's "Alien." Onscreen, the character Dan O'Bannon was portrayed by Charles Cyphers (pictured above), who played Sheriff Leigh Brackett in "Halloween" and "Halloween II." And yes, the name Leigh Brackett refers to a legendary screenwriter who worked on such diverse movies as "The Big Sleep," "Rio Bravo," and "The Empire Strikes Back."

Does anyone remember Jillian Barberie (pictured above), the frequently harassed but obliging spokesmodel who predicted gameday conditions on “NFL Fox Sunday” from 2000 to 2005? And if you do recall her, do you remember any of her forecasts? We didn’t think so.

Christopher McDonald (pictured above), typically cast as s privileged, smarmy nemesis in comedies (“Happy Gilmore,” “Dirty Work”) got his due as a dramatic actor playing meteorologist Todd Gross in “The Perfect Storm” (2000). And yes, there really is a Boston meteorologist named Todd Gross, who played a prominent role in forecasting the Perfect Storm of 1991.”You could be meteorologist all your life,” Gross (McDonald) says, “and never see something like this. It would be disaster of epic proportions. It would be the perfect storm.”

Now, if you were Peter Griffin in “The Family Guy,” sitting in a theater audience, at this point, you would blurt out, “That’s the name of this movie! ‘The Perfect Storm.’ How’d they do that?” Speaking of “The Family Guy,” this bring us to Quahog’s Channel 5 Action News weatherman Ollie Williams (pictured below), noted for such monosyllabic outbursts as “It gon rain!” and “It’s rainin’ sideways!” Ollie, whose resemblance to Al Roker is undeniable, is voiced by the talented Phil LaMarr, one of the original cast members on “MADtv.”

Without a doubt, the most popular (and most quotable) fictional weatherman has to be Phil Connors, the cynical Pittsburgh meteorologist who reluctantly journeys to Punxsutawney, with his effervescent producer (Andie MacDowell) and smart-mouthed cameraman (Chris Elliott) in tow, to report on the annual emergence of Punxsutawney Phil in “Groundhog Day” (1993). Unbeknownst to his coworkers, Phil (the weatherman, not the rodent) is forced to relive Groundhog Day over and over and over again, a dilemma he eventually manipulates to his personal advantage, declaring, “I’m not going to play by their rules anymore.”

In a typical forecast, Phil Connors says, "Out in California they're going to have
warm weather tomorrow, gang wars and some very overpriced real estate. Up in
the Pacific Northwest, as you can see, they're going to have some very tall trees."

Not just one of the most unique romantic comedies to be cranked out by Hollywood, “Groundhog Day,” as a tale of self-improvement through repeated “rebirths,” became a favorite of Buddhists, which wasn’t surprising, since co-writer, co-producer and director Harold Ramis embraced the religion after his 1989 marriage.

During the shooting of ”Groundhog Day,” Bill Murray and Harold Ramis (whose longtime collaboration included the box-office hit “Caddyshack”) had a professional and personal falling out that remained unresolved for more than a decade. The two reconciled before Ramis’ death in 2014. Less than a month after Ramis’ passing, Murray went out of his way to utter a personal tribute to Ramis at the Academy Awards.

A comedian-actor-author-musician whose respect and admiration rivals that of Bill Murray, Steve Martin starred in “L.A. Story” (1991) as a TV meteorologist (pictured above). Some audiences regarded the romantic comedy as West Coast-Woody Allen, skewed with New Age precepts and Martin’s distinctively surreal take on Southern California culture clutter (rampant road-rage shoot-outs, a mystical freeway sign that gives Martin romantic advice, and a timely storm divined by a song from the darling of New Age sirens, Enya).

This is the moment in the newscast that calls for a restroom-refrigerator break because we’re going to mention two portrayals of meteorologists that induce yawns and glances at watches. If you’re at all familiar with the redundant career cycles of John Travolta, you know that he pops up in a series of stinkers before redeeming himself in a box office hit. This schmo has had more comebacks than Madonna.

“Lucky Numbers” (2000) is one of those festering boils in his résumé. Directed by the late Nora Ephron and costarring Lisa Kudrow (the “Friends” actress who stole her career from Teri Garr), the film casts John Travolta as a celebrity weatherman (pictured above) with financial woes who gets embroiled in a lottery fix. Inspired by the 1980 Pennsylvania Lottery Scandal, “Lucky Numbers” was filmed on a budget of $63 million and made less than $11 million at the box office.

Nicolas Cage, not unlike John Travolta, an overrated actor, faces a midlife crisis in as the title character in the 2005 drama “The Weather Man” (pictured above). Directed by Gore Verbinski, who made the first three “Pirates of the Caribbean” pictures, as well as “Rango” and “The Lone Ranger,” the film would have us buy into British actor Michael Caine as Long Beach-born Cage’s father, a casting kerfuffle as perplexing as Caine’s roles as a Georgia farmer in “Hurry Sundown” (1967), a 17^th century German mercenary in “The Last Valley” (1971), a Maine doctor in “The Cider House Rules” (1999), and a Texan in “Secondhand Lions” (2003).

 

Wearing green slacks in front of a green screen, weatherman Brick
Tamland (Steve Carell) is convinced his legs are gone.

Saving the best for last, we tune to Channel 4 for Brick Tamland, the news team’s simplistic weatherman in “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy,” played in blissful ignorance by the never-disappointing Steve Carell (whose chilling performance as convicted murderer John Eleuthére du Pont in 2014’s “Foxcatcher” earned him an Oscar nomination as Best Actor).  “People seem to like me,” Brick (Steve Carell) declares, “because I am polite and I’m rarely late. I like to eat ice cream, and I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks. Years later, a doctor will tell me that I have an IQ of 48 and am what some people call mentally retarded.”

Overall, “Anchorman” is a dead-on parody of the ‘70s and the celebrity status surrounding TV newscasters, featuring Will Ferrell as Ron Burgundy, the egotistical, thickheaded anchor, David Koechner as Champ Kind, the rude, crude, over-the-top sports reporter, and Paul Rudd as Brian Fantan, feature newsman and ladies’ man. Christina Applegate arrives on the new scene as Veronica Corningstone, a professional rival of and romantic interest for Ron Burgundy.

Adam McKay,the co-writer and director of “Anchorman,” was a founding member of the Upright Citizens Brigade, the improvisational comedy troupe from which Amy Poehler emerged. For two seasons, McKay served as the head writer on “Saturday Night Live.” McKay and Will Ferrell founded the website Funny or Die. McKay would direct Ferrell in “Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby,” “Step Brothers,” and “The Other Guys.”

Out of the director’s chair, McKay was a producer for the Will Ferrell comedies “Land of the Lost,” “Casa de Mi Padre,” “The Campaign,” “Get Hard,” and “Daddy’s Home.” Apart from his collaborations with Will Ferrell, McKay directed Christian Bale, Steve Carell, Ryan Gosling, and Brad Pitt in “The Big Short.”

Ron Burgundy's physical look in "Anchorman" was purportedly based on
Harold Greene, an award-winning journalist in Southern California news.

Produced by Judd Apatow, “Anchorman” is rife with welcome faces, including Fred Willard as the flustered station manager, Vince Vaughn as a rival news anchor, Jack Black as an irascible biker, Seth Rogen as an “eager cameraman,” and the inimitable Danny Trejo as a worldly bartender.

But the highlight of cameo roles in “Anchorman” occurs during a hilarious alley fight between competing news teams. The uncredited news anchors include Luke Wilson, Tim Robbins, and Ben Stiller (look fast and you’ll spot Ben’s pop, Jerry Stiller, in a wordless cameo at the bar with the aforementioned Danny Trejo). Afterwards, a stoked Brick Tamland (Steve Carell) gushes, “There were horses and a man on fire and I killed a man with a trident!”

 

"Brick, where'd you get a hand grenade?" "I don't know."

Nine years later, in the bloated 2013 sequel, “Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues,” the filmmakers, including director Adam McKay, tried to top the mayhem with an overblown battle royal in a park, this time with Jim Carrey, Sasha Baron Cohen, Kirsten Dunst, Tina Fey, Harrison Ford (who transforms into a were-hyena), Liam Neeson, Amy Poehler, John C. Reilly (as the ghost of Civil War General Stonewall Jackson), Will Smith, and Kanye West.

The sonorous, authoritative off-camera narrator for both “Anchorman” movies was Bill Kurtis (pictured below, with Will Ferrell in character), a long-respected newsman who, interestingly, provided the voice for Roger Ebert during the final broadcasts of “Ebert Presents At the Movies.”

At 99 minutes, “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy” was welcomed by critic Roger Ebert, “Most of the time ‘Anchorman’ works, and a lot of the time it’s very funny.” In the Moviehouse, we greet “Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues,” which clocks in 20 excessive minutes longer than the original, with the backhanded praise, “A few times, ‘Anchorman 2’ works, and sometimes it’s very funny.”

At least they gave Brick (Steve Carell) a love interest in the sequel, a mousy newsroom secretary (Kirsten Wiig), whose first date with the tongue-tied weatherman is at a laundromat soda machine. Brick spills out his heart, “I like your hair. It looks like wet popcorn.”